On December 13, 2009 at 1:00PM EST, a virtual meeting about domestic violence, featuring several gender rights activists, will occur right here on Altmuslimah. Join us for this important event – the instigator for what Altmuslimah and partners hope will be fresh perspectives, solution-oriented discussion, and an active campaign against domestic violence in the Muslim community.
Welcome to our online event! If you’d like to enter a comment or question during the event, you may do so in the box below. You will be prompted to sign in – feel free to do so, or skip this step to comment anonymously. If you have an account and want to log in, type “/login” into the box. Your comments and questions will appear on this website and others, so please be respectful and considerate. Abusive behavior may result in your being removed from the event.
1) Unfriendly mosque environments for domestic violence work: At a Philadelphia mosque, a guest imam was heard giving a speech about domestic violence. His remedy? For men to avoid breaking their wives’ bones or hitting them above the waist. How, from your various perspectives, can campaigns on domestic violence in the Muslim community respond to environments like these?
2) The gray area between civil and religious remedies in cases of domestic abuse: A New Jersey woman had gotten a civil divorce from her husband, though there were still some questions in her mind. What really was the status of her religious marriage at this point? How do we navigate the use of civil legal remedies (e.g. restraining orders, divorce) given their divergent status from religious recommendations/remedies?
Associate Editor, Altmuslimah
Masters Candidate, Harvard Divinity School
Associate Editor, Altmuslimah
Voorhees, New Jersey
Training Coordinator, California Partnership to End DV
San Francisco, California
Bonita R. McGee
Board Member, Islamic Social Services Association (Chat username: darwi73)
DC Metro – Northern Virginia
Co-Director, Peaceful Families Project
Great Falls, Virginia
Project Manager & Media Consultant for Project Sakinah
Founder of Muslim Men Against Domestic Abuse
Executive Director, Close to Home
Staff Attorney, Aid to Victims of Domestic Abuse
Attorney & Immigration Practitioner, Law Office of A.M.
Richmond Hill, New York
Guest Contributors (offline)
Imam Khalid Latif, Executive Director and Chaplain (Imam) for the Islamic Center at New York University
Community Action Projects
Let’s use this V2A web event as a kick off to a DV awareness and prevention campaign, starting now through February – the month marking the one year death anniversary of Aasiya Zubair. Sign up for projects or express support in the comment box below. (Contact information will be transferred to a private form and deleted from the comment box at the end of this live event to protect privacy.)
Registering projects with Project Sakinah, a new site launching on January 1st, 2010, is a great way to keep a log of the all the projects being carried out.
Send video clips of your projects to us, Altmuslimah, an online magazine devoted to solution-oriented commentary on gender-in-Islam.
1. Fund-raise to bring the Garments for One Another video package and other materials into mosque and community libraries. These invaluable resources are designed to guide religious leaders and community groups helping DV victims. Organize simple fundraisers like Jummah bake sales. It’s a great way to involve youth in community projects!
Project mentors: Shazia Riaz, Maha Alkhateeb
2. Sponsor mosque khutbas and lectures on DV for Friday, February 19, 2010. Suggest adaptations of Hamza Yusuf’s khutba and Imam Majid’s open letter. Encourage the incorporation of useful information from recommended sources.
Project mentor: Imam Khalid Latif, Peaceful Families Project.
4. Digital diaries at Altmuslimah: connect survivors of domestic violence willing to anonymously share their stories with our project lead.
Project leads: Yusuf Misdaq, Shenaaz Janmohamed. Mentors: Aimee Thompson, Yasmin Turk
5. Promote healthy relationship messages on Valentine’s Day 2010 by ordering greeting cards for friends, family, and community with Islamic messages about healthy relationships. Printable templates will be added at Project Sakinah in coming weeks, or cards can be ordered through a project lead.
Project leads: Zerqa Abid, Shazia Riaz, Shenaaz Janmohamed
8. Build the ISNA Domestic Violence Resource page by submitting articles, papers, and other resources that may help their viewers access vital resources (eg. shelter information, counseling services, hotlines…).
Project mentor: email@example.com
9. Sponsor MSA halaqas and group discussions on DV between now and February, 2010. Encourage MSAs to submit video clips of the events for an Altmuslimah feature on DV prevention as well as to PFP for their Take A Stand campaign.
Project Mentor: Shenaaz Janmohamed, Altmuslimah
11. Organize a Guys’ Night to engage more men in DV prevention. Order in, watch a game, and incorporate a discussion around healthy relations and DV prevention. Resources on DV and the importance of men stepping up may be reviewed.
Project mentor: Mohammad Khalil, Shenaaz Janmohamed
13. Suggest project ideas of your own!
Here is a video summary of the Voice to Action workshop held on October 17th, 2009 in Arlington, VA:
ABOUT DOMESTIC VIOLENCE:
Domestic violence is a pattern of abusive behaviors used by someone to establish power and control over another person in a relationship. Domestic violence sometimes follows a cyclical pattern in which there are periods of calm, building up of tension, and then abuse. After a period of abuse, batterers are often apologetic, but as the cycle repeats the abuse usually gets worse over time. If abusers recognize that their behavior is wrong and sincerely want to change the way they act, they can get help through batterer’s intervention programs, therapy, and spiritual counseling.
Facts: The statistics indicate that one in three women in the USA is, has been, or will be a victim of domestic violence. According to a study conducted in 1993 by Sharifa Alkhateeb, as president of the North American Council for Muslim Women (NACMW), physical violence occurs in about 10% of Muslim marriages in the USA. The rates of verbal and emotional abuse may be as high as 50% based upon international studies and preliminary research in the U.S.
Children:Many people think that domestic violence does not affect children. However, children who are in households where domestic violence is happening have the same symptoms as children who are abused themselves. Domestic violence can cause long-term developmental, emotional and other problems in children.
Immigrants: Many immigrants fear they will lose their legal status or get deported if they seek help. Calling any of these organizations will not result in loss of status for the victim. Please call the organizations directly to get more information about your particular situation.
(Source: Peaceful Families Project)
ALTMUSLIMAH RESOURCES ON DOMESTIC VIOLENCE:
Does a bullet kill less than a blade?
Removing the silence on domestic violence
Holding Muslim men accountable
A distressing statement from NOW-NY
Modern-day slavery and its 27 million victims
Harmful parenting: the roots of domestic abuse
The Saudi bitch slap
A disturbing look into a killer’s psyche
Abuse, asylum, and America
The divorce dilemma
Honor killings in Islam: Is there a link?
Asma T. Uddin is the Editor-in-Chief of Altmuslimah