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 Thursday, April 24, 2014 | 24 Jumada al-Thani 1435
A married woman
When I was growing up, my Iraqi-born mother responded to my requests to travel alone, consider schools out-of-state, or stay out late with friends with the same answer, “When you get married.” Once I got married, I’d be somebody else’s problem. Then, it wouldn’t be her place to tell me no. Then, it would be my husband’s job to worry about me.Marriage, in my adolescent mind, was the only way to an independent adulthood. Western culture may have referred to marriage as settling down, but I associated it with freedom ()

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Latest in Relationship & Sexuality

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Today Salma responds to a worried wife and a misunderstood child.


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Ask M: Confusion about the men in my life
In today's AskM column, M responds to two women dealing with confusion and ambiguity about the men in their lives.


I am alone.
Surrounded by friends and a community that should understand me
They know me as popular, confident, and happy – supposedly.
My sisters dress the same, look the same, and crack the same jokes as me.
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  Salma's Advice  
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In today’s column, Salma responds to a daughter whose elderly mother is in a verbally abusive marriage and a mother whose son seems unable to manage his anger.


  Love and Family  
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I’ve been through my share of cross-generational challenges, but lately I have met a place of rapprochement as I remember the things my parents have taught me, directly and indirectly, about relationships. Their wisdom has its roots in a land and culture so far away that the advice doesn’t always translate to the millennial ways of the Starbucks-drinkers and instant-satisfaction seekers. It is a wisdom that cannot be found in HuffPost articles, Buzzfeed lists or Facebook shares. ()

Ask M: Can I still find love and marital bliss after losing my virginity?
In today’s AskM column, M responds to two women: one who is struggling to with find a husband while having a sexual history, and one who feels overshadowed by her sister.


M Responds: “The one who got away”
In today's AskM column, M gives advice to two women: one who cannot stop thinking about the past, and another who is learning how to find a partner on her own. ()

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  Ask M  
M Responds: Dating incognito & reconciling Islam and feminism
In our first AskM column, M answers your questions about how to communicate with parents when courting someone and how to balance your partner's expectations with your own feminist ideals.


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I am estranged from my father, and no, I don’t like talking about it. Why bring it up in the public sphere? Because I get too many intrusive questions about him in the private sphere, and this is my way of setting the record straight.


  Race and Marriage  
Black + Muslim + Woman
“It’s because you’re black.” He repositioned himself in the chair, then looked down at his cup of coffee and grabbed the handle. I could tell this conversation made him uncomfortable. He was from the subcontinent but had the swag of a black brotha. He said he was having a hard time find a sister from his background because he couldn’t relate to them. “I’m sorry, it’s just my family wouldn’t be happy…” He said this apologetically while taking a small sip from his drink. ()

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