Rushing into a physical relationship before establishing social commitment is harmful on a personal and societal level. A sad reality is that the online dating industry is built on this shadiness for purely economic reasons. A sadder reality is that well-intentioned people are sucked into it. It’s a downward spiral that starts from the very first click.
Dating sites don’t demand sincerity or understanding. Rather, they encourage shallowness and selfishness. Like Amazon.com, dating sites boast a wide product selection, quick purchases, free shipping, and easy returns. Except the “product” is a human.
The economic reason is simple. Selling recurring “hook-ups” is far more profitable than selling one life-long commitment. A long-term relationship will kill a customers’ need for the dating service. A series of purely superficial encounters will keep suckers coming back for more.
Technology fans the flames. Digital “likes”, “winks”, and “IMs” are veiled excuses to express interest without sincerity. Effortless (and thoughtless) clicking and texting marry users to the site itself, overload users with misleading social cues, and divorce users from meaningful dialogue
The sincere and committed leave, and the only ones left are those who seek anyone but. Here are some examples of how typical dating sites surrender users to the lowest common denominator:
1 – If you’re on a free dating site, you’ll only find takers who want something for nothing. It’s a terrible start to a relationship.
2 – If you’re on a site where you can simply ‘click’ to express interest, you’ll be clicked by serial offenders who’ve clicked every single profile hoping to see who bites. Fishing is fun, but not for the fish.
3 – If you’re on a site with a Facebook login, you’ll trade your privacy to join a large community of semi-interested people instead of a small community of fully-committed people. Facebook makes connecting easier, not better.
4 – If you’re on any dating site, your profile will most likely be ceded to search engines, social media, or ad agencies. You’re a cheap display advertisement first, a real human second.
5 – If you’re on a site that let’s you define exactly who you want, you’ll only find people who are never happy with what they have. You’ll be tolerated, but not accepted.
6 – If you’ve ever been on a dating site in the past, you’ll always be on that dating site in the future. Your profile is kept for marketing purposes.
7 – If you’ve cancelled your service, you’ll receive constant messages from an avatar hoping to lure you back on the dating site.
8 – If you’re on a dating site now, you might benefit, but your community definitely will not. No dating site on earth rewards communities that support their users.
But don’t despair. There is hope.
24fate is a matchmaking service with a mission to help people and communities in a simple and fair way. Our hope is to vastly improve the user experience while bringing integrity and dignity to the process of finding companionship online.
(1) Our job is to get you off of the site, not rope you in or keep you on.
(2) Your job is to sincerely reach out. Trust is earned, not granted. It’s not easy, but it’s honest.
Principles and profits can hold hands. They found each other on 24fate.
Arif Shaikh is an investor in 24fate.
This is a sponsored post. If you register, we’ll receive $10.00 from 24fate. Thank you.
Photo Credit: MattysFlicks